Category Archives: Good Times with good people

Overly Obsessed With Harry Potter

I just wanted to share the conversation I had via text messaging with a good friend/former roommate the other day while I was at work.

It’s about Harry Potter.  Here it is. Verbatim.

Me: Oh my god there are Weasley look-a-likes in the restaurant! The one who looks like the twins even has on a striped scarf!

Former roommate: KIDNAP THEM FOR ME!!!!!!!!!!

FR: But he has glasses, so maybe he’s more of a Percy.  The kid with him is totally a Charlie.  And I will try to kidnap them; they’re very tall!

FR: Percy was taller than the twins!

Me: Totally a Percy, then. I want them!

Me: I’m creepily staring at them. Decided it’s Percy and a cross between Ron and Charlie.

FR: Just ask the parents if you can have them!

Me: No parents around. Percy looks our age and they’re out on a brother-date! So fucking cute.

FR: ASK PERCY ON A DATE FOR ME!!!!!

Me: I can’t just go up to Percy Weasley and ask him on a date for you!

FR: …Yes you can!!!!!

Me: Oh my god he even does the looking over the rim of his glasses thing I pictured Percy doing when he was a prefect!

FR: PLEEEEEEEEEEASE! unless charlie is near our age. Then him.

Me: The more I stalk him the more Ron he becomes.

Me: Ron is about half a foot taller than Percy.  But looks about 17. Percy looks in his early 20s.

FR: But I want ron!

Me: I think he’s talking about a college course now. He may be at least 18.

Me: Spoiler alert: they don’t have British accents.

FR: Did you ask them out for me?

Me: No. I’m sorry…

FR: Our friendship is over.

Me: I’m sorry. But you can’t just go up to the Weasleys and ask them out!

FR: YES YOU CAN!

Me: NO YOU CAN’T! YOU COULD MAYBE DO THAT TO NEVILLE OR LUNA OR CRABBE AND GOYLE. MAYBE EVEN HERMIONE. BUT DEFINITELY NONE OF THE WEASLEYS!

Three hours later…

FR:  Still mad at you.

Me: Sorry…

FR: It’s too late to apologize…

Me: I’m so sorry. Celebrities intimidate me.

FR: Jerk!

The next day, after me telling her I’m (joke) mad at her about something…

FR: Listen. I’m still mad about the Weasley incident.

Me: I’m sorry. Maybe I’ll see them again.

FR: If you see them again and don’t ask them out for me this friendship is OVER!

Me: I’ll never let a Weasley look-a-like pass by without me harassing them again!

FR: I’m glad you’ve learnt your lesson.

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Filed under Good Times with good people, I'm making fun of me, It's my fault I'm so goddamn awkward, Let the Lameness Roll, So Damn Excited, The Opposite of Romance

Apparently there IS such a thing as partying too hard

I had a fantastic Friday night.

Followed by a miserable Saturday. Not hung over, just congested, high fever. Whatever.

Took Saturday night off from drinking like a responsible person.

I wasn’t too upset by this because the Tuesday of finals week is the big night of the semester. Everyone goes out because there are never any finals scheduled on Wednesday.

So I was saving up.

Unfortunately, by Tuesday I wasn’t really feeling any better.

But, like the true champion I am, I decided to go out anyway. I mean, it’s Reading Day Eve.

It was a pretty fantastic night.

There were parties happening on almost every street corner.

Two of my roommates and I split a bottle of whiskey (on top of the random beers and margaritas I had consumed along the way).

I smoked probably half a pack of cigarettes. Maybe more.

There was so much dancing.

And, like the week before, I woke up miserable.

Except this time it was serious. I wasn’t just feverish and congested, I was coughing up blood.

I’ve heard that’s generally something you don’t want your body to do.

Fortunately, I got to the doctor today, got on some antibiotics, and am going to be fine.

But I may have learned an important lesson here. Don’t party while you’re sick.

On the other hand, it was such a good night.

Yeah, I would make the stupid decision again.

I’d party again.

Always.

Fuck my health.

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Filed under Celebrations, Good Times with good people, I'm making fun of me, Let the Lameness Roll, Things I don't like about the World, Under the Influence

Marx and Vader

Yesterday was St. Patrick’s day.

I don’t really care about this holiday.

I’ll wear green just to avoid getting pinched by those obnoxious assholes who think it’s okay to pinch people just because it’s March 17.

But not really my holiday.

I really hate corned beef and cabbage.

Despite not really caring about the holiday, I went out last night. Mostly because I’d heard a rumor there was free beer at a nearby bar.

That turned out to be false, but whatevs.

I went with my roommate and a friend.

About five minutes after getting there, roommate and I lost our friend. Didn’t find him for the rest of the night.

Saw lots of people I work with, which was uncomfortable. Saw Curly-haired Crush’s ex, which was more uncomfortable.

Danced. Briefly.

After the last song, roommate and I decided we wanted to go walk around town because we weren’t tired. We also only had mild buzzes going on, because the bar had been so busy it took about 20 minutes to get served. I probably could have been served sooner if I’d flashed some cleavage, but it wasn’t really worth it.

We ran into an acquaintance of mine. We aren’t very close, but we started talking and got invited back to his place to hang out.

I’m so glad we did, because later in the night some people there started discussing Star Wars through a Marxist point of view.

Best. Discussion. Ever.

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Good

Last night was a good night.

Up to a point.

There were two fantastic parties. Lots of dancing.

I talked to curly-haired crush (who happens to be in Spain for the next few months) while drunk.

I had a great time.

And then I threw up.

Fucking Mad Dog 20/20.

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New Year’s Eve

I’ve been wearing a onesie lately.

For warmth.

It’s bad. Really bad.

Thermal. White. there’s a butt flap. It buttons up.

Just bad.

On New Year’s Eve, I wore it in public. Only the onesie, not anything over or underneath. This is what happens when I drink.

But I’m so smooth, that despite wearing what is possibly the most unattractive piece of clothing in existence, I still got laid.

Oh, yeah.

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Filed under Good Times with good people, The Opposite of Romance

Clumsy

Yesterday, I was in a book store with Best Friend.

We were of course browsing the sex book section.

And I saw one very interesting-looking book.

Unfortunately, when I pulled it off the shelf, several more books came with it.

They fell to the floor.

Them some more did.

And more.

And soon the whole shelf was on the floor.

Best Friend and I just stood there with slightly open mouths while this happened.

And then shoved all the books back on the shelf in no particular order and quickly slunk out of the store.

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It Was a Busy Night

I went to a party Tuesday night. It’s finals week, and there are never finals scheduled for Wednesday, so of course 80 percent of the school uses that night to get wasted.

I went to this party. First awkward moment of the evening: I wore this really great vintage dress. The bad part is, the built-in bra is very strange and old and lumpy, and after I’ve been drinking a while I typically end up walking around making people feel my breasts. Yet I still wore it, knowing this might happen.

Second awkward moment: When I got to the party, they put in a DVD of porn bloopers. I’ve seen porn before, several times, and been fine, but this was gross porn. We’re talking sheer thong swimsuits, long fingernails, and 80’s hair. I was mildly disgusted. Also, I apparently have a lot of expression in my face when I watch movies. Sometimes Best Friend watches my face instead of the movie because it’s more entertaining. At one point while the movie was in, someone yelled out, “Look at Sarah Scott’s face!”

I left the room after the first blooper was over.

Third awkward moment of the night: I was leaving a later party to go to a dance party at a frat house with a group of friends. While we were waiting on someone in the group, a guy came up to me and started talking to me. He seemed cool, and I was getting gay vibes from him. Of course, my gay radar is terrible, and I was quite drunk at this point, so I really shouldn’t have trusted it. But because he seemed cool and extremely unlikely to make a move on me, I invited him along.

Turns out I was wrong. We were at the party about 10 minutes when he started grinding on me. Despite having seen me kiss on somebody else a few minutes prior.

Yeah, my life is awkward.

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Filed under Awkward Moments, Celebrations, Good Times with good people